Interesing things are attracted to me.

I don't seem to be having as many "ordinary" days as I used to. Home schooling is becoming "ordinary." What is not ordinary is: having a house wren in my house and doing an unplanned header at Sabrina's soccer game!!

So, I'm deviating from the title of this blog, but thought you'd all be interested in my un-ordinary week.

Wednesday, I was sitting at my computer after my students left (that makes it around 4-5 in the afternoon). I thought Sam was outside or at the neighbor's house. I kept hearing the sound of our metal mini-blinds being moved. There was no other sound. My first thought was that Sam was watching our backyard feeder through the blinds on the backdoor. But he was so quiet for so long. Finally I decided to quietly investigate what was really going on.

Sam was not in the house--a calm little house wren (or maybe a carolina wren) was flying to the window trying to get out. When that didn't work, she'd fly to the large mirror, then she would rest on the ceiling fan blades. Over and over again. My presence didn't make her panic, so I slowly opened the front and back doors. She didn't move, so I called the neighbors and asked Sam to come home and help me.

Now I couldn't find her--had she left while I wasn't looking? No, she was in the kitchen perched on the window valance. I discovered the door to the garage ajar--that must be how she got in. I opened it all the way. Then I got behind her and she would (calmly--no crashing panic) fly away from me until she finally discovered the open door to the back yard.

What an amazing thing. I shut all the doors just as Sam showed up. I wished he could have seen her, it was something else!!

So, fast forward to Saturday night. Sabrina's Shanendoah University team is playing Christopher Newport University (CNU). That school is basically just across the busy road from our house. I found a sub for all my Saturday night church committments and Sam and I went to the game. It was freezing and the CNU team (full of seniors) beat SU (only 2 seniors) by 8-0. After the game, we went to see Sabrina. As we were leaving the field the men's CNU team was getting ready to play a game. As we were almost off the field, a wild ball bounced off my head (right behind my right ear). I never saw it coming. I felt and heard it, realized I wasn't vertical anymore, realized I was laying on the ground and bunches of people were "Are you all right?"ing at me. I was dazed. I kept wondering how this was going to affect my tendancy to have headaches. I started tearing up (which made me feel like a fool). Some guy was holding my hand and helping me walk (which made me feel about 80 years old--especially with the tears). Finally I felt in control enough to tell him I was fine.

Sabrina walked us to our car, we hugged, and Sam and I drove home. My head felt a little strange, but no danger of concussion. But this morning I discovered that something is bruised on my back side. It is rather uncomfortable to bend over, or rise up from or get down to a sitting position. Once I'm seated, if my weight is mostly on the right it isn't too bad. Hopefully by Thanksgiving I'll be okay.

So, my un-ordinary week had its ups and downs, but at least it wasn't boring!!

Sunny Day

We went to the park, did some school there. It is a beautiful, but chilly day. We are seeing the sun for the first time in quite a while. Sandy Bottom Nature Park is a very nice park. It takes about 15 minutes to get there. It has lakes and swampy are, a nature center, beautiful trails, and even camping. You can rent canoes or paddle boats.

Sam and I just wandered around a bit. We didn't have all afternoon with 2 NILD students due later. We want to go back on Friday if we have another nice day. Then we could stay as long as we wanted. There are 2 letterboxes hiding in this park and we would like to find them. It is a fun, low-pressure hobby that adds an element of mystery to hiking in the park.

Sam is now willingly and without grumbling, doing all the dishes chores (clearing dinner table, loading dirty dishes and emptying clean ones.) He also keeps the water bottles filled and in the dishwasher. These chores are on his list of "school activities" that must be done before he can play or watch entertainment TV. I love having a 10 year old with the ability and willingness to do work.

Today, Sam asked if he could keep his gameboy all the time (I had been taking it and he had to ask for it to get it back). He suggested that since he's using self-control with the TV he will be able to have self control with the gameboy. He listens to digital music and does not change channel to watch anything else--right now he switches between classical and contemporary Christian.

He's growing into such a neat kid. I am so glad that God directed us this direction. I find myself enjoying spending time with my son and really liking the person he's becoming.

Never stop learning

Wow, I had a busy weekend. I spent most of the weekend at church. We had a woman come in to talk about "Harnessing the Power of a Balanced Life." She spoke both Friday night and all day Saturday. It was inspiring. I hope to use the material rather than just walk away from it.

Sam actually told me at the end of the school week that he "missed nagging." When I asked for clarification he responded that school took longer than it used to. I am still not nagging, but I am pointing out to him where his time wasters are. The nagging came when he would resist or fight against these reminders. Now, when his attitude is resistant I just walk away and let him waste his time.

We do have a much more peaceful day this way. I plan the entire week on Sunday night (willing to make adjustments if needed). Planning is the one thing that is almost completely lacking in my life--it is where I need balance. Without planning very little gets done except the "bare minimum."

So, I am going to work in baby steps to reach a balanced life while Sam tries to create internal motivation that really works.

Sam is also learning to do a regular chore. He's in charge of dishes. This means that he loads it, decides when it needs to be run, empties it and begins the cycle again. Right now he's in the apprentice stage (he does the work under our instruction). I hope to see him graduate to journeyman by age 11--where he doesn't need constant instruction, but only quiet supervision to make sure that everything is getting done. He seems to be accepting this without complaint which is a huge improvement over his demeanor last year!!

Responsibility changes addresses

Here I am advising my sister to let her teenagers suffer the consequences of their decisions instead of rescuing them (not bad advice, but keep reading). I discover that it is MUCH harder than I ever thought to actually do that.

I discovered that I was nagging Sam into getting his school work and chores done in a timely manner. I would state consequences that would matter to him and then nag him to keep him from having to suffer those consequences. What a hypocrit! So, today I was determined to follow through. He had not finished his tasks yesterday, so I made up a consequence and put it into place (no TV next day). I locked down the TV so nothing would air (gotta love cable), and went to sleep.

This morning, Sam comes in to ask why the TV won't work (he likes the digital music stations as background). I told him it was consequence of not having his chores done and he can prevent it happening again tomorrow by getting things done today.

All during the day all I asked was "How're you doing?" or other encouragements in a very positive tone. He got it all done (much later than on a nagging day---but so much more peacefully).

Wow, what a change. I also instilled a number of lessons per week in various subjects barometer to make sure we have a complete week even if we have a couple of harried days.

Each week things seem to improve in some manner. With God's help, this will be a successful endeavor. Sam still prefers home school over private school. Yay!!

Who's Character??

Last week I mentioned how nice it is to be free to take the time to deal with character issues. This week God has been doing some "housecleaning" in my own heart and I'm wondering just who's character we're working to build here. Of course, the answer is all of us.

If I could learn to not lose my cool I'd feel like the World's Greatest Mom. That is something that was shown to me this week in all its ugliness. While it made me feel so ugly and horrid--I am grateful that God is not letting me ignorantly continue unaware of the ugliness like a whitewashed tomb.

So growing is painful, but worth every heart and body ache. I am already looking forward to Thanksgiving. Hoping to have a house full of family!!

Character Development

To develop character takes time. Time that isn't devoted to rushing around, doing homework or getting ready for bed. We didn't have that kind of time with Sam in school. His homework took up most of his free time and then he'd want to play with his neighborhood friends, or we'd be off to martial arts class or homegroup or.... you get the picture.

Sam needs a little help in developing this character. With him and I being together all day long, I am more aware of which behaviors are a problem and which are just being a kid. So, on Friday he spent about an hour sitting in his room because he could not give me "30 seconds of adult behavior." What I was getting instead was crawling or laying on the floor, nonsense noises (often in a high pitched voice) or at best, turning away from me and saying things with the wrong tone of voice). Now, when I asked for "mature behavior" he knows he can do it--at least for a short period of time.

We got tested for martial arts this weekend (yes, Dwight and I are green belts now--watch out!) and Sam passed without probation for the first time. Always before his behavior (read as bad attitude) kept him from passing that day. We began with prayer--just Sam and I, for God to give us the ability to honor him whether we passed or not. God does care about this stuff.

I am more excited about this than his leaps of comprehension in math or science or any other academic subject. With his gifts he can learn what he needs when he needs it, but character is the most difficult thing to learn. Thanfully, God is giving me both insight into Sam and the ability to see his progress--even the baby steps. We are celebrating them!!

My friend Jude has asked for computer lessons again. Her tenacity is a great example to follow. She is not willing to quit or give up--and so is learning how to do things that I am not even teaching her. In many ways it seems the easiest money I've ever earned and is certainly some of the most pleasant. It feels like a social get-together as much as a teaching/learning session.

Tonight Sam and Dwight are getting out the microscope to see if there are any germy things in the water in our birdbath. I hope they find something.

Oh, and creative writing may not come to Sam very often, but he spontaneously composed the following poem:

Chickadee
By Sam Kinter

Chickadee, chickadee
can fly so high above thee.

I love the spontenaity of it and am encouraging him to refine or add to it. I am not obsessing about creative writing any more, how much does a techno kid need to do? He is spontaneously inventing all kinds of things that he tells me about--just not composing essays or other written work. I think it will come later on its own--or I can add it when he matures to prepare him for the SAT which now has an essay section.

Vacation Week

Ah, the flexibility of home schooling. We took a trip to Indiana last week. My parents celebrated 50 years of marriage. This is something we couldn't miss (of course), so we just started school a week early and then took a vacation last week. (Plus we did some reading in the car, too).

So, we had a great time and didn't have to try to do school or make up work in an unusual environment. Sam got to play--he's enamored with "World of Warcraft" and is hoping for permission to buy it with his own money. Since it also requires a monthly fee, we are still thinking about it.

The week before we left, we lost our cable modem to an electric storm. I lived without internet for a whole week here at home. I certainly have come to rely on it for finding information and for entertainment. I think when I fast to focus on my relationship with the Lord--it isn't food I need to refrain from, but the computer. Our church does it one Wednesday a month and I'm going to do it this week, so don't expect anything from me on Wednesday!